A Letter to my Coaches: Susie's Story
This morning I woke up to an email in my inbox. It was from a CFJ athlete, who happens to also be our yoga instructor and a dear friend. It was titled, "A Letter to my Coaches." I asked her if I could share her beautiful words on our blog. One reason why I love her so much is because she strives to be "transparent," as do I. Susie, your coaches say, "Thank you," right back. Namaste.
A Letter to my Coaches
Do you ever get the feeling that people and opportunities show up in your life at just the right time? Maybe you call it fate, karma or just plain coincidence; but you start seeing that these are signs pointing you in a certain direction. I’ve thought for a while that I would enjoy CrossFit, but I never took the plunge for money reasons and me holding myself back for no good reason. Most of 2014 and 2015 CrossFit kept popping up in my life. I would meet people that were living testimonies of the good that it has done in their lives: teachers, trainers, friends and even some family members. And when I decided to seriously look into CrossFit all signs pointed to CFJ. When I finally reached out to Jaime she told me that I can’t put a price on my health. You’re right, Jaime; I’m gaining so much more than my health… I’m gaining my life back. And money can’t buy this kind of richness.
In the front of my mind I had finally decided that I had allowed myself to gain enough weight and that it was beyond time to get back in shape. I knew that I was having a difficult time holding myself accountable to go to the gym. And I knew that I hadn’t practiced much yoga since I had stopped teaching at a studio about 3yrs. back. So, it was time to try something different, something that all signs were pointing me towards, giving CFJ a try. It’s been a great experience so far. It’s even rekindled my yoga practice. And then this dreaded 60 day challenge came along…
I signed up for the challenge because I had completely let my eating and drinking habits get out of control, I wanted to lose weight and create healthier habits for myself. I’m succeeding at both of these goals, which is great. But I say I’m gaining my life back, not because of this, but because I feel like I just crawled out of a dark hole. I’ve struggled with depression since I was young and when it becomes severe, it’s as if I sink into it and become oblivious to what’s happening all around. I’ve been in this hole for about 3yrs now… I started eating unhealthy, drinking more (this got me back into my old smoking habits), I put on 75lbs and all that “good” stuff. Before I knew it, I had lost myself in depression. And as much as I know how all of what I just listed helps feed depression, I never notice until it’s almost too late. I can’t begin to tell you how good it is to actually feel the warmth of the sun again.
We’re a little more than halfway through the challenge now and I’ve definitely wanted to give up a million times, luckily, I enjoy a good challenge. I also have the best accountability group. I may not have made it this far without them. But no matter who takes the cake at the end (bad pun, I know), we are all winners. I’ve learned so much more than proper lifting and healthy eating. This challenge has brought me closer to my friends and family, our connections seem more genuine. And I’ve learned how to love myself again. I am forever grateful for each and every one of you. So thank you all from the bottom of my heart.